Pumpkin Men

From the Archive:

It was passing noon and I could tell everyone was hungry so I was going to take the car into Hardings to pick up food for everyone. This was in a post-apocalyptic setting. I asked my mother if I could take the car, then I remembered back to an earlier part in the dream when I had taken the car out last night and gotten drunk and trashed it (though I wasn’t positive on this). She said I could take it but I’d have to hurry as the lunch specials were about to end. I left the house and ended up on the other side of the golf course. There were suddenly lots and lots of people who had come out to my home town to both steal from the rich and beg for money. Most of them were pretty downtrodden and slow, however, I was able to outrun everyone. I started to run across the golf course over by J’s house and I realized some people were keeping up with me. I turned to check who it was and it was 2 guys and a girl. As I continued running I explained why they couldn’t come with me. I’d jump over a snow bank and say “you’re much too out of shape to keep up with me,” then I’d slide over some ice while the guys fell and say “you don’t have what it takes.” The girl kept up with me though, I was attracted to her so I told her to follow. We ended up at the top of the intersection of Doster road and the road that connects it to my road. I said… “You won’t have any problem keeping up here, this is all downhill, and it’s all fun!” and I was preparing to run down this road that was covered in snow with huge slopes on either side. Just as I started running, pumpkin men came walking up from the bottom, and they also sealed off the top (groups of men who walked around carrying pumpkins by their heads). I believed these to be explosive pumpkins. They fanned out down the hillside to perfectly cut off all my ideas of escaping up or down. I instructed the girl to follow and I jumped over the edge. As I floated they began launching pumpkins, I deflected them with my feet, and dodged others. When I reached the bottom I started trying to throw pumpkins back at them, one of them was hurling really large pumpkins, I couldn’t quite take him out. Then a bunch of random people showed up to fight against he pumpkin men. We started to turn the tide, I ran up to a nice shiny SUV and yelled “DESTROY THEIR ____” (not sure what that word was). I ripped off the rearview mirror, and then ripped off the wiper blades. I was about to smash a window when someone inside said “dude… we’re not with them.”